Doctor, Death and Superstitions!

I work night shifts this month. That means, I walk into a nearly empty hospital at 7PM and leave at 7AM when everyone else is coming in yawning and puffy-eyed! So far, I’ve been able to leave in a fairly decent mood in part because of the high that 6AM coffee gives to my sleep-deprived brain. But, last night was different.

I was finishing my shift and it was almost 6AM. I was carrying, along-with my regular pager, what we call the “Code Pager” which is a dreadful gadget that only rings when someone in the hospital “codes”, meaning comes very close to or is on their way to death. We got paged for a new patient who had just rolled in from one of the hospitals nearby. Of course he was sick. But we didn’t know just how much, and that caught us off-guard.

He had come in unconscious, breathing heavy and in that moment, for all that I knew, with a very little chance of survival over the next few hours. We gave him all that we could, but he wouldn’t improve. It was twenty minutes to 7AM.

FUNNY: Official Pakistan Government Site Plays Pun On Itself!

One of my friends passed me this screengrab! I am sure that it is unintentional but yes, Mr. Gillani (Pak PM), we agree, your country’s economy couldn’t do without “chemicals” ::cough:: and billions of $$$ of US aid ::cough::

Enjoy the light moment!
- A

Times Of India (TOI) SUCKS! But, there’s no option!

One of the sad things about being away from India is that you miss the spectacle of news channels trying to make the most unimportant and tasteless news into a delicacy that promises to change your life forever! Don’t the nostalgic flashbacks of news anchors shouting at the top of their voice never fail to bring warmth to your heart too?

So, what do all you NRIs who want to stay connected to the “pulse” of your mother India do? You type in timesofindia(dot)com. (I am deliberately avoiding a direct link to the site as I don’t want to be cursed for 3days when you will be in bed with that headache that just won’t go away!)

In a brief moment, as your life flashes before you, Times Of India website loads up. In it, you see a bunch of naked women, a few outright adult articles, a whole section of news on who killed who, who kissed who, who got naked, who didn’t get naked but is shouting foul etc etc. Somewhere in that pile of words, you will find, and I don’t promise this, a few actual “news” articles. The kind which, apart from getting you some great bedroom ideas, have the potential of changing your life.

In essence, in Times Of India world, Manmohan Singh takes a backseat; wars are boring too; and Anna Hazaare and his chums playing kabaddi with Mr. Sibal are “too routine” to make the cut. So what if world is at the brink of another financial meltdown, for the editors of Times of India, why “Mrs. Australia bares all” is just as important a news.

It is indeed saddening to see how Times Of India website which started out as an authentic source of news a few years ago has been reduced a mere tabloid in a race to garner more page views. But, I don’t blame them entirely, for we, the readers also have contributed to a large extent to its fate. I mean, Times Of India is just showing what we want to see!

I don’t have the official numbers but I can bet my dog’s food that Katrina Kaif’s sexy pics

Bringing the sexy on! :)

It’s the beginning of summer season here in India. Most of you around the world wouldn’t care, but for the 1 billion people who live in this part of the planet, it means just one thing – run for shelter! The temperature will easily soar above 100 degrees (Fahrenheit ofcourse!) and unless you are really unlucky, you will find yourself waiting somewhere inside for the sun to set.

For me though, there could not be a better time for change. Not some “look he’s put on a few pounds” kind; more like “omg so this is what puberty is all about” kind of change. I am revamping everything about Naam-to-batao. Yes Sir! Old wrinkled skin will be shed to reveal a brand new (botoxed actually!) silky-smooth sensuous beauty.

Why should you bother reading?
For the same reason you watch the same news over and over during the entire day and then mumble ridiculously through the night much to the annoyance of your (gay?) partner! Ok, that was under the belt! But the point is, some of the things on N-tee-Bee can be worth your time, and if I can be arrogant enough to say so, actually interesting!

What is the change that you keep blabbing about?
So I admit! I hired ‘Image Consultants’ to trim the flab and make this thing look good!

Ripped off – My story at Nokia ‘Premium’ Care.

Yeah, quite like a million others on the globe, my phone malfunctioned. The right function key and the volume up keys not working frustrated me to the extent of seeking ‘professional’ help. So, I searched for NOKIA Care centers and found the closest one in Defence Colony, Delhi. Went in with high hopes of getting my pricey E71 back in pristine condition – what was I thinking? When the guard at the door flashed the million dollar smile, I should have guessed that something was gonna go wrong; but I smiled back little knowing that he was actually smiling AT me 10 mins into the future.

After filling a form, I sat in front of a girl who ‘informed’ me that the phone was out of warranty. I said whatever and she charged me Rs 110 as ‘Inspection charge’. Told her the problem which she communicated to the shady tech guy sitting behind her. That man took the phone in his hand, played with it for exactly 5 seconds, touched the keypad twice, and returned the phone into my hands with an estimate of Rs (wait for it) 2,850! Just two keys blown, and he doesn’t even open the cover to know why, and gives me an estimate equaling his month’s salary. I smile